My husband and I were in the Harz Mountains in Germany this week. Hiking for hours and hours, basking in the glorious rays of sunshine on the first warm spring week, and processing, digesting, and talking about our feelings.

I told him I felt like this is shaping up to be one of our best years and I’m looking forward to a busy, productive summer full of traveling and new experiences. Being that we went through such a traumatic event a mere seven weeks ago you would be forgiven for having the opinion that we’re nuts for thinking this way. Shouldn’t we be at home in our sweatpants, crying in bed, refusing to participate in life, and allowing our world to fall apart?

But that isn’t what I’ve chosen for myself and neither has he. These last few weeks have showed me there are things I have zero control over and I’ve made peace with that. I’ve accepted what happened and I’ve accepted there was nothing more we could do. I accept where I am in life right now.

Everyone keeps telling me how strong I am in the face of such adversity and the utmost cruelty life could throw at me. But, I work to be strong and I choose to be my own hero everyday. It’s easy to allow fear to hold you back from working towards what you want, to use trauma or difficult circumstances as an excuse for why you’re not trying.

The “why me?” mentality was stuck on a loop in my head for weeks before I broke the tape player and unwound it. You take back control in life when you make the decision to stop being a victim and start being the hero. Sure, there are a million things we can’t control, but what we can do is choose how we react to these circumstances. That is a cliche thing to say, but only because it’s the truth.

Fear and the constant cycle of “what if…” is the problem.
Fear leads to stagnation.
Fear leads to inaction.
Fear leads to a life on the couch, scrolling the internet, watching other people lead amazing lives, and feeling terrible because you’re too afraid to do the same.

But, here’s the thing: You can do the same thing.
You can lead an amazing life.
You can be successful.
You can be happy.

It all starts with the decision to make life happen rather than letting life happen to you. It’s the scariest and best thing in the world when you realize that you have the power. You have the control. It’s your decision what your life becomes.

Imagine you’re in a boat in the middle of a lake. Taking control of your life and actions is the difference between having oars or allowing the current to push you where it wants you to go.

We were not put on this earth to be unhappy. Just think for a minute about how big the universe is. We don’t even know half of what is going on out there. You, as a human being, are part of this crazy, inexplicable, miracle that none of us can comprehend. If you’re playing the victim, you are wasting the opportunity that you were given.

Become your knight in shining armor, the 007, the big strong savior who gets there just in time. Be the hero of your life and throw that victim mentality out the window.

pbr