So, yoga is pretty relaxing and chill, right? But mostly everyone has, at one point or another, felt pretty damn awkward (or annoyed) in class.
And I’m here to tell you that you aren’t alone. Please leave a comment if you’re familiar with these scenarios or have other stories, I need a good chuckle.
The first truly awkward incident I think most yogis run into is the “why is this person sitting so close to me” moment. This is the single most infuriating moment in class. You’ll be minding your own business, maybe laying in supta baddha konasana, eyes closed and just zoning out after a long day. And suddenly you hear that, slap of a mat unrolling and the sticky sound of someone’s feet padding close to your head. You peep a look and someone has set up their mat a mere 2 inches from yours. In an otherwise empty room. And if you’re lucky, they’ll smell as though they haven’t showered in days. You’ll certainly begin to wonder if this is a test of your patience, and it definitely is. You’ll flare your nose and grit your teeth for the entirety of your flow, as you avoid your neighbors flailing arms.
Slimy, unexpected rags
I don’t know how often others have this issue, but it happened to me recently and I thought I was going to lose it. I was settling into savasana. Eyes closed (are we noticing a pattern yet about closing your eyes whilst laying in class??) and the room got really quiet. Now, I’m used to a certain type of ending to my classes, and this was a new studio for me, so I kept thinking, “okay, class is really quiet, but no one said ‘namaste’, so this must be required relaxation, I can get behind that”. Then out of nowhere, I have a mild heart attack because I have this sopping wet rag, doused in lavender essential oils pressed over my eyes. It was also freezing. Now, this was so off-putting for a few reasons. One being that I didn’t or wouldn’t have preferred this soaked rag on my face, especially considering I was wearing mascara and put on my eyebrows that morning. And secondly, I hate lavender. This is a personal opinion obviously, but this was an unexpected and terrible surprise.
The Monotonous Moaner
This is an uncommon awkward moment, but it’s something that can be so off putting. Now, I don’t want to judge other people’s practice, but this was something that made a lot of people in my class uncomfortable and distracted. This is the person who will moan, in a very inappropriate way while in class. I remember this particular person kept moaning and groaning in class, and regulars in the studio actually had to stop their practice to bury their heads in their hands to keep from either giggling or screaming. If you, or someone you know does this in, say a power vinyasa class, it might be appropriate to suggest an at home practice for them or a class with some more chanting.
The Chatty Enthusiast
This is something that endlessly confuses me! I have had moments of feeling incredibly weird when people just start talking in the middle of class. I don’t mean before, when everyone is greeting each other and whispering about their days, that’s totally fine for me. I mean, yoga is a community! We’re all friends! But mid-class is pretty…..not cool. Last week a woman actually talked directly to me in the middle of warrior one and said, “Wow, this is kicking my ass! How are you?” and smiled at me big. I smiled, giggled and chatted with her after class. Certainly makes you take class a little less seriously!
Choking and Coughing
This awkward moment is near and dear to my heart. And in this instance, I’m not the victim, but the perpetrator. I have this really awful situation where I have coughing fits in the middle of class. Like, when you get that terrible tingling in your throat and can’t get rid of it, so you end up coughing hysterically for about 10 minutes? Yeah, that. And I’m the person who does this. I usually have to get up and leave the room, with bloodshot eyes and tears streaming down my face because I can’t get the tickle to go away. I’m just as embarrassing as anyone.
Have you experienced any of these (or other awkward yoga class moments)? Share your faves (or least faves) with us!
Cheers, folks! Hope you enjoyed my awkward moments from yoga classes! Remember to have fun and forgive your fellow practitioners for their quirks, they are doing their best, just like you!